"I got nothin'"

The title of this post comes courtesy of one of my Primary kids (all six years old). He had been protesting that certain girls in the class got to say more prayers than he (the only boy) did, so he had requested to give the Opening prayer the following week. Once his turn rolled around, he deferred until the Closing prayer. However, once he had his little arms folded and his head bowed, he sat there for a moment, and then looked up at me and said, "I got nothin'." We tried to give him some suggestions, but in the end he let one of those girls have a turn!

Anyway, that's sort of how I've felt about blogging in the past few weeks. It's not so much that I really have nothing to say, but more that I haven't had the inclination to actually sit down and compose any posts. I have also been very neglectful of commenting on anyone else's blogs, and I do apologize. I have most blogs on Google Reader, so I am reading them every day, but then I generally log off and forget to comment.

So now I could probably write a dozen posts, but I'll spare you. Or maybe, if I can stay awake long enough at some point, I'll write a bunch, and then set them to appear one-a-day or something. We'll see. I have so little energy. I never got the second trimester burst of energy, and nobody knows why because my iron levels are perfect. It occurs to me, though, that I've never been that peppy or energetic even when I'm not pregnant. So generally, if Kiddo is sleeping I am either sleeping too, checking everyone else's blog, sleeping, feeding my horrific appetite, sleeping, or watching reruns of The Office. I had never watched a full episode before, but a friend loaned us the first season on DVD, and now we've been working our way through the second season (from the video store). I think I am hooked, although I sometimes wonder: has a more annoying character than Michael Scott ever been written? My favorite episodes so far are "The Injury" and "Dwight's Speech." I laughed so hard that the Daddy-O was sure I'd wake up the Kiddo!

Speaking of Dwight's speech and the Kiddo, I was taking some snapshots of my cutie last week, and for some reason he came up with the following pose:

Now when I look at it, I am reminded of Dwight unknowingly paraphrasing Mussolini and waving his arms and pounding his fists. Any Office fans out there who remember what I'm talking about? :)

Merry Christmas?

He liked it last year!!!!!

I may have the world's weirdest kid. I finally brought up the Christmas tree. Was he excited? NO! He was hysterical! He doesn't like it! While I was out of the room, he knocked it down and broke his Baby's First Christmas ornament! It's a 2 foot tree-- what could possibly be so distressing about it? I don't know. He's still in time out. I'd better get him in a minute or so. WHAT a pill!

And this is the view out our front door. Not much of a white Christmas. Why can't it snow here? Why must we have rain, rain, and FREEZING RAIN all the time? Yuck.

Okay, enough complaining. Here is a cute photo of Kiddo. Maybe that will put me in a better mood. Hope your Christmas is merry and bright!

Buyer's Remorse

Or, why you shouldn't shop when you're tired and hungry...

Friday night I had a terrible case of insomnia, so I stayed up VERY late loading videos of Kiddo on to Google Videos (so I can just share them with specific friends or family members). Saturday morning came way too fast, and after a small breakfast we went to the Library for Storytime. We ended up spending quite a bit of time there, and afterwards we went to Aldi to pick up some groceries.

By the time we got to Aldi, Kiddo and I were both famished, and I was about to fall over from being so tired. He was getting whiny about having to ride in the cart, and then he saw me put M&Ms in the cart, but I refused to give him any (mean, mean Mommy). The whining escalated. As I turned down the next aisle, he cleverly spotted a toy he's played with before at his beloved Target, and asked to hold it. He promised to stop whining, so I handed it to him in hopes of a more relaxing trip. By the time we were ready to check out, he was becoming unwilling to part with this toy. I mentioned to Daddy-O that it was on sale for $7.99 which was a much lower price than we'd previously seen (about $20). I further pointed out that it was an educational toy, with games involving spelling, telling time, counting. Then I supposed that it would be a good toy for a long car trip, since it has so many features. Daddy-O considered it, and said we might as well buy it. A little voice in my head asked, "Are you sure? Does he really need it? Can you truly afford it?" Then the evil voice said, "Oh, but it's on sale-- such a good deal!" Obviously I wasn't thinking clearly due to the hunger and exhaustion, so I said, "Yeah. Let's get it."

All the way home Kiddo played with this toy. As soon as we got in the door, he resumed playing with the toy. In order to get him to eat or take a nap, we had to drag him away from the toy. When he woke up, he went back to the toy. The next day, the first thing he said to Daddy-O was, "Go get the new alphabet toy?" When Daddy-O asked him if he wanted to go say good morning to Mama, Kiddo replied "NO" and moved straight past him to go down the stairs. He cried when we told him he couldn't take it to Church. He ran for it as soon as we returned home in the afternoon. And on and on and on...

On the one hand, great, he loves the toy. He's more interested in it than in watching TV or getting into mischief. Theoretically, I could get lots of things done since he is so wrapped up in this toy. On the other hand....

One of the settings is "Music." I may have mentioned before that Kiddo LOVES music. He has since he was in the womb. So I showed him that each letter plays a different song. So, of course he is really no longer interested in any of the educational games. And for 3 days now, he has been playing song after song after song after song after song after.... and mostly just a few of his favorites. Some of the "arrangements" of these songs are a little manic, and kinda give me a headache. Plus the lights flash in different patterns for each song. And, here's the best part, he wants to share this toy with me. He wants me to sit with him and tell him each song title and teach him all the words, even the ones I don't know or don't like. I think I'm going to go crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, there's an off button, and actually the toy goes off by itself if he leaves it alone for a while. BUT, it tells him goodbye when it turns off. So he gets upset and runs back over and turns it on again. Every time that happens, it makes the sound of a phone ringing. Why? I don't know. Probably just to send me to the nuthouse.

But if you could see the joy it brings to his face... ai-yi-yi... what am I going to do?

brief update

Not much is going on here.

• Kiddo is still smart, still cute, still stubbornly independent.
• Daddy-O finished his summer class.
• It's been, as I like to say, too hot for humans this month, so we've been staying hidden in our house and I am still perhaps the palest person you've ever seen.
• I'm at least trying to not say cr*p in front of Kiddo, even though I still don't think it's a bad word. I'm relieved that 50% of you agree with me on this issue and will do my best to not offend the 20% who vehemently disagree. I've been trying to find a better word. Daddy-O favors "crikey," and it's hilarious to hear Kiddo say that. However, the origins of that expression are questionable, so I'm sort of leaning toward fiddly-wah-diddly. I'm actually not sure how you spell that.
• I have completed 1,777 pages of my library books, so that leaves a mere 2,298 to go. I have been good and not checked out any new books for myself, but I have not been so good about Kiddo's books and CDs. Thus, I still have 47 items checked out from the Library. Don't judge me.
• Speaking of the Library, we've completed their Summer Reading goal by having read to Kiddo for 24 hours-- not all at once, of course. ;) It's starting to show, as he is now memorizing his favorite books ("A told B and B told C..." "...he was sent to bed without eating anything..." "and those were the first words Trixie ever said..."). Tomorrow he should get his little certificate of completion or whatever other lame prize they're handing out. And trust me, their prizes are almost all really, really lame.
  
• Our town built another new Wal-Mart, the fanciest I've ever seen. It's gorgeous inside and out, for a Walmart, anyway, and yet... still full of Rednecks. We have a very large contingency of Rednecks here.
• I have decided to wait until August 1st to change my profile photo (*see post entitled "Any suggestions?"). Add your opinion now or forever hold your peace.
• When asked to predict the winner of the 2008 Presidential election based solely on their photos, Kiddo informed us that while he "likes" McCain, our next Commander-in-Chief will be Barack Obama. My guess is that he just likes the sound of Barack Obama, and it sure sounds cute when he says it. You heard it here first, folks.

My husband says I'm bugging him with all this typing noise, so I guess that's all for now. We hope you're having a great summer!

Something to think about...

It's no secret that I'm a raging perfectionist, at least when it comes to myself. When it comes to others, I usually think they're way cooler, more beautiful, funnier, smarter, more spiritual, more talented, more creative.... and on and on. I've been this way for most, if not all, of my life. Just recently, I read part of a book about the trap of perfectionism, and one thing it pointed out was how we American women are bombarded with images of what it means to be "perfect" all day long. I started thinking about what it would mean to me to be perfect-- as a mother, wife, Primary leader, daughter, sister, neighbor, friend, scholar, worker, homemaker, crafter, etc., etc., etc. (not to mention being a size 4 who never indulges in junk food and exercises 6 times a week)-- and I realized that this perfect lady I'm always feeling bad that I can't be probably doesn't exist. She would have to live happily on less than 4 hours of sleep EVERY day and have 12 or so conveniently retractable arms and legs.

Having this V-8 moment has certainly not ended my feelings of inadequacy, but I find if I can remember to challenge my negative thought processes, I can also spend less time feeling bad about myself. And that's good for everyone.

I just saw the following article on www.time.com, and found it correlates with what I'm trying to teach myself now, after many years being stuck in the perfectionist trap. I think it's an excellent idea, and worth incorporating in our own lives in some small way. Click on the link below to read more. In the meantime, be kind to yourself, 'cuz after all, you rock.... especially if you leave a comment on my blog. :)

Taking On the Thin Ideal - Fit Nation - TIME

In case you need a laugh...

As an actual crazy person, I have to say, it's pretty true to life! :) Although I haven't actually ever had a therapist with pillows. Don't they get paid enough?!?!

Progress Report...

So, I read and returned both of the books checked out on the Daddy-O's card-- that's 450 pages read. And little by little, I'm making it through The Green Glass Sea; so far I've read about 150 pages of that. So that SHOULD put me at 600 pages down, 2,097 to go...

EXCEPT that

"OOPS! I did it again!"

Yep, when we went to the Library on Saturday, I picked up another five books:
321 pages + 377 pages + 264 pages + 136 pages + 280 pages = another 1378 pages

Therefore, out of 4,075 pages, I've read 600. Just 3,495 more pages to go!

EXCEPT that

I've got to take Chief Smarty-Pants to Storytime tomorrow. Do you think I can make it out of the building without checking out more?

It's an illness, I tell you, a real sickness.

By the way, a friend invited me to join GoodReads last week, so I see no hope of the insanity ending any time soon. Check out my widget on the left side of the blog if you want to find out more.

A Very Fine Mess

I have a problem, an addiction of sorts. Until recently, I've reassured my husband that it's a healthy addiction because it keeps my mind active, relaxes me, gives me something to talk about other than our kiddo-- and it's free. Well, now that only 2 of those 4 statements are true, I realize that maybe I need to work on this addiction. Have you guessed what it is yet?

I check out WAY, WAY, WAY too many library books at one time. I don't know why, except that there's definitely too many books to read and too little time in which to do it. I think I'd need a whole lifetime just to read everything I'm interested in-- not to mention that I rarely take time to reread my favorites! And I just can't admit I've bitten off more than I can chew. I just keep renewing them and renewing them until I can't any more. Then, if I still haven't finished something, I try to get it again the next time, or even put it on hold again if I know it's a popular item. I don't even care if they're kids books and I'm depriving an actual child of the joy of reading them first. It's sick, I know!

I've done this since childhood, and usually I do a good job of keeping track of all of my materials, even the DVDs, CDs, and books for Kiddo... (who currently prefers being called "Chief" or "Man," or even "Old Man!") Well, now I'm losing it, I guess. I left 3 Signing Time DVDs at my Mom's last weekend, and she had to mail them to me so they won't be overdue. Now I'm even checking out items on my husband's card when I've forgotten my own or when I've wanted more than the whopping 5 movies they allow you to check out. Today I realized that I've now accrued over $6 in fines on his card because I'd forgotten to renew those items, not to mention the fine I just paid off on my own card yesterday... So now he can't check anything else out until I pay for "his."

Meanwhile, my house is a mess, I still have to make a birthday cake and card for my husband, I owe several emails, I'm exhausted, and I still have the following to read for MYSELF:

• Digging to America, 277 pages, due 7/21, already renewed 2x
• The Green Glass Sea, 323 pages, due 7/21, renewed 1x
• The Heart is A Lonely Hunter, 359 pages, due 7/22, renewed 2x
• The Host, 619 pages (WHAT WAS I THINKING?!?!?!), due 7/23, doubt I'll be able to renew it
• Hungry Planet, 285 pages, due 7/23, doubt I'll be able to renew it
• These Is My Words, 384 pages, due 7/22, renewed 2x

+plus, on Daddy-O's card:

• Keeping Score, 202 pages, due JULY 1ST, can't be renewed because of fines
• Shug, 248 pages, was due JULY 1st, but now renewed until 7/24, 1st renewal

So far, I've completed 42 pages of Keeping Score. So, out of 2697 pages, I've got 42 down, 2655 to go. YEAH. Wish me luck... Anyone wanna come and baby-sit or clean my house? :) I'll be your best friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I thought not. See you next month or something...

Do you think he's TWO or what?

So, it's been a while since I posted. But since I note an appalling lack of comments from readers, I feel no guilt about this-- well, maybe a teeny bit, but not much. Somehow I found this very amusing blog-- http://borrowedlight.blogspot.com -- okay, let's face it, I was probably blog-stalking or whatever it's called. Anyway, I noticed she has the following page element below her list of archived posts:

"If You Choose Not to Comment...
...that's fine - just be aware that I may die. Really. Because every person who reads without commenting kills off another little piece of my SOUL. I just wanted you to know. So you can, you know, have a clear conscience at my funeral. Which might be soon. No pressure though. "

I considered adding it to my blog, too, but I guess that's plagiarism. Anyway, you get the point, right? But, no, I didn't comment on her blog, because she already gets 30+ comments a post. I don't think she's going to die any time soon.

Okay, to the title of this post. The kiddo turned two on Saturday. I decided not to have a party with guests, invitations, decorations, etc. because I realized that I would only be doing it because that's what I think the "Perfect Mother" would do. I also realized that it would be a lot of effort and expense, not to mention the STRESS on his perfectionist Mommy for something he will not remember in the future. It was also Youth Conference weekend, so between that (their parents serve in the youth programs) and vacations, most of the few kids he knows wouldn't be able to go.

So here's what we did. I decided to try to fill his day with lots of his favorite things.

• His Gobby, the light of his life, was here.
• He got to wear his Michigan shirt.
• We sang to him.
• We took him to Storytime at the Library.
• We had Pizza for dinner.
• We opened presents. For the first time, he REALLY enjoyed this and knew exactly what to do. He calls it "opening packages." :)
  
• We went to the grocery store. Yes, he does love this. I'm not even joking.
  
• We listened to Buddy Holly.
• We read stories.
• He got to eat a cookie.
• On Sunday, we had his cake. He LOVED the chocolate frosting, and put his hands in it before we even got the candles on.
• On Monday, we met Daddy at Cold Stone Creamery during his lunch hour and shared his free Love It size "Signature Creation." If you have a Cold Stone in your area, you should really sign up for their birthday club. YUM.
  

He seems to have enjoyed all of his gifts, but his favorites might be the magnetic numbers and the faux MagnaDoodle that I bought for 88 cents each. It doesn't take much to make them happy at this age.

EXCEPT-- that every day since then, Kiddo has had at least one tantrum. He doesn't like what I give him to drink, there's (gasp) veggies on his pizza (as there always has been, mind you), he wants cookies for breakfast and we don't have any, he doesn't want his diaper changed, he wants Daddy to come home from work NOW, he can't listen to the same CD three times in a row, he doesn't want to go to bed, his Gobby went back to her house, the food is taking too long to cook, we returned his favorite DVDs to the Library.... the list goes on. Evidently, Kiddo has a mean, mean mommy. And don't get me started on his reaction to having his fingernails and toenails cut. I swear, our neighbors must think we torture the poor kid. Nope, he's just asserting his desire for independence. So, I'm really tired these days. And to think I wanted him to hurry up and be a toddler because they can talk and are more interesting... where has my placid little baby gone? :(


Well, if I can recall where I put my camera, I'll try to post some photos. Right now I think I need a nap.

My Little Quack

Over the weekend, our little guy FINALLY decided he wanted to start walking again! Hooray!! He'd been standing, and making slight attempts for a few days, but his first real go at it was walking from the parking lot into the grocery store on Saturday evening. Once inside, he just kept walking... and walking... and walking all through the produce and over to the baby items until finally he wore himself out and rode in the cart. I was so happy I was sniffling and wiping away tears in the middle of Meijer! I didn't even really care if the other shoppers thought I was crazy!

My husband and I had debated for the previous week if Kiddo needed to go back to the doctor. Daddy-O thought something was seriously wrong, but I had been observing the little invalid very closely and became more and more certain that he wasn't in pain any more but was just scared. Mother's intuition, perhaps?

When my son started walking again, I felt a lot like the Mama Duck in Little Quack, which, coincidentally we checked out from the Library last week. I don't know if you've read this cute book-- Kiddo really likes it. The illustrator came to one of the schools I worked at in Ames, but I missed it because he showed up early, before my scheduled hours! :( Anyway, Mama Duck invites all her little ducklings to come paddle with her in the water, but they're all a little hesitant. One by one, they each get brave enough to jump out of the nest-- except Little Quack. I believe he says to her, "I can't, Mama. I'm just too scared!" Mama tells him, "You can do it! I know you can." Of course, he finally musters up some courage and splashes in to the water, crying, "Look at me, Mama! I did it! I really did it" and the Mama replies, "I always knew you could."

Even though I knew my little duckling could walk again, I am so grateful to finally get that confirmation! Now we're back to Independent Kiddo, who wants to walk through the neighborhood for hours on end and cries when it's time to come home. It's sure good to have him back, even if he is a little pill! :)

I hate tornado watches!

ARGH! Being the nerd I am, I've been super-excited about the finals of the National Spelling Bee airing on ABC tonight. This is actually the one channel that we get that is always clear, so it's quite the event for me. But now they're issuing a tornado warning, so I guess I'd better head to the basement. Let's hope this all goes away in the next 49 minutes, eh?

By the way, if you like documentaries, and I do, check out Spellbound! It's about eight real kids competing in the National Bee, and it's highly entertaining. I loved it. Akeelah and the Bee is also good, but it's fiction, if that matters to ya. Bee Season, however, was very strange and I don't recommend it.

Well, let's hope the tornado doesn't eat me while I'm blogging! BYE, GUYS and GALS!!!

UPDATE (10 p.m.): I got to see about FOUR spellers before the weatherman took over for the next TWO HOURS. I swear that the Midwest is a dream location for TV meteorologists!!! They get to interrupt scheduled programming all year long, even if it's a season finale or a one-time only airing. ARGH! I am so peeved!!!

Seeking advice...

I was just wondering, if any of my readers have successfully potty-trained a boy. If so, how did you introduce the process to said boy(s)? How many weeks/months/years did it take? I used to babysit a boy while he was learning to use the potty, but that was only one day a week and it was stressful enough! I counted my lucky stars someone else got to deal with it the other 6. My little man-child is very interested in the bathroom, flushing, and usually comments that his old diapers are "'tinky." So I don't know, does that indicate interest in potty-training or not?

Are there any books, videos, websites, or pointers from others that were helpful to you?